How Dare I…
Share about what’s possible in our human potential. How dare I trust my feeling and intuition over any established system.
How dare I know and speak to the limitations of psychiatry, psychology, and medicine. Even science. Who the hell am I?
I don’t have a PhD. I didn’t even finish college.
How dare I know I’m a Cosmic Being beyond religion or mainstream new age spirituality.
I think about Jesus and other historical figures as if they are my personal friends and guides. I feel my own personal connection to many traditions and paths. How dare I do this without the Bible, the Gita, the Koran, Torah, or any formal holy scripture.
I don’t do hours of research or have statistics or ‘proof’. I don’t even always know what’s going on in pop culture or the news. How dare I not care about proving how smart or right I am.
I see myself as bigger than any race or status or class or nation. I love being a woman and understand the imbalance yet have no interest in gender politics. How dare I see beyond our superficial differences.
How dare I not cater to separation through identity politics.
How dare I see social justice as shallow.
How dare I not volunteer and ‘do good’ and don’t participate in the latest bandwagon causes.
I don’t have a glamorous or impressive lifestyle. (although I’m open to that happening, I want to experience flying first class on a trip and enjoying lots of nice things. That would be so much fun!)
I speak about these things yet still get shaky and uncomfortable speaking to people and a small audience. Yet I love being the center of attention at times and sometimes think how amazing it would be to be on a grand stage speaking to thousands of people. Yay, look at me everyone!
The last presentation I gave was a free public talk. Two people came. I was happy though because without those two people I would have not even gotten to talk.
How dare I confuse you (and myself) by attempting to go beyond the mind. How dare I change my mind and opinions so easily.
How dare I write yet struggle with spelling and grammar (it does bug me though, so if you see mistakes I appreciate it if you tell me, I won’t be offended)
How dare I love laughing and giggling over dirty jokes. I’m still not over how hilarious farts are.
How dare I enjoy my sexuality for its own sake. Without pretense. Without guilt or power games.
How dare I make money off helping others.
How dare I don’t make money off helping others.
How dare I tell you that your darkness is the path to your light.
How dare I claim to understand pain and terror.
How dare I feel brave & determined and terrified & weak at the same time.
How dare I say that it all has a purpose.
I really have no credibility to stand on. Why should anyone listen to or trust me. Especially when I talk about things like past lives and enlightened teachers and higher consciousness. Who am I to even say that enlightenment exists. I’m not enlightened.
For all you know I have a mental disorder and have imagined all of it. Ha, yeah, I used to worry myself.
Regularly feeling profound reverence and bowing to my teacher and all the other advanced or enlightened beings past and present, yet I talk about self-empowerment. How dare I know that they are one and the same for me.
How dare I feel that truth does not require me to be small, falsely humble or to suffer. Truth can find us when we are on top of the world and living the most privileged life imaginable (If you are one of those people, can I come to one of your grand cocktail parties? I’m serious, can I? ? )
Truth can find us in our trauma. Loss. Poverty. In our rage. In our separation.
How dare I know that truth is inside each of us. Just sometimes deeply buried.
Existence has given me life (my parents deserve some credit though). I belong here. I don’t earn credibility or authority from other people or a society built on unconsciousness and control and fear. I am not better or higher than anyone. I am sometimes, or often, more aware. Other times I’m in the presence of someone who is more aware than I. Doing my best to recognize and bow to greater awareness though. Whether it comes through me or another. Or both.
How dare I see how far I can go, how dare I ask questions, most of all how dare I try to wake up and know who I truly am.
I’m pretty much a nobody. Living in the Midwestern U.S. Doing my entry level day job at an office trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing next.
Yet here I am, feeling that anything is possible.
I bet you have a “How Dare I” stream running inside you. Maybe we share some of the same ones? What does yours say? Wanna share some of them with me? I’m curious.
Leela Haris ~ Expanding Consciousness