Not feeling good enough for someone. Who hasn't felt this way at some point?

​Here is my understanding about this.

​When we are carrying an insecurity about ourselves, we may experience others as not accepting us.

This can result as patterns of conflict with others or of trying to please them. This is very common but keeps us trapped in a painful and draining situation.

You can watch for any time you want to prove something to someone or get them to accept you in some way.

When you spot it happening: Stop. Breathe. Breathe slowly and deeply. And instead of focusing on the other person, explore your inner world (thoughts, emotions, sensations). 

You can take this even further by exploring with an intention to see the Truth. 

If you can manage to make this shift in focus, if you can withstand the initial force of resistance, before you even get to an insight, you will already feel a huge shift. You will likely feel energized. 

I call this INNER EMPOWERMENT. 

People are incredible reflections of what we need to understand within.

This does not mean we allow ourselves to be mistreated all over the place. This is not contrary to speaking up and not allowing someone to impose their judgments or views on us. In fact, it may lead to doing just that. Not as a hurt-based reaction, but out of a self-respect for ourselves.

Seems paradoxical, but the inner focus makes us kinder and more honest. We become trustworthy. Because we minimize burdening others with our pain. Our hearts can open in the recognition that others are struggling too and that it has nothing to do with us personally.

I've experienced this countless times.

But at first I would beat myself up. Feeling bad that I was doing something wrong to draw to me negative reflections and dynamics.

But with time more joy and self-compassion has come in. And with experience I know the consequences of not doing it and the incredible awe-inspiring gifts of doing it.

*****
If you want support and are in Kansas City this November, Madeleine Newkirk and I are leading a Communicate with Your Heart workshop. See if it speaks to you.
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I don't go to art museums much anymore. I used to. I've always loved visual art. But when I discovered something called Process Art years ago, I realized what I loved.

It is aliveness. It is spontaneity. It is originality. It is the surprise of color and form and how they interact.
I appreciate an artist's skills, the talent that comes from years of hard work and practice. Professional artists deserve recognition for the beauty they bring and inspire.

But what I appreciate the most is the energy that comes from someone being present in the act of creating. Professional or not. The aliveness is captured, and it does not matter to me what it looks like.

This often comes from the very people I meet that tell me
I AM NOT AN ARTIST

They look to me for permission "Is it okay if I come to your painting class?” There is something inside that is longing to be expressed.

The answer is of course always YES

This image is my painting. Many of my paintings look like they came from a young child and I have loved painting them. Freedom of expression brings an inexplicable joy and expansion and taps us into the inner essence of creativity.

Artists. Non-artists. It's all good here. Because there is something deeper happening than the mind's perception of "good" - "bad" or "appropriate" - "inappropriate".
​
That is why I have chosen to call these classes Meditative Painting. (If no classes currently scheduled - sign up at bottom of events page to be notified when they are).